problem solved --
when i flipped thru further into the booklet, it says the metal codemeter has to be remotely programmed.
so i went to the Graphisoft website and tried to do that -- still didn't work. so i re-installed Java, and it still didn't work.
so i restarted my computer with the key in it, and it still didn't work
so then, instead of using Firefox -- my default browser -- i tried Internet Explorer. eventually, that worked.
nothing worked in the sequence the Graphsoft booklet said (why??), it didn't work the way the key upgrade webpage said it would, and no one ever asked me which browser i was using.
anyway, it works now.
you guys must be sick of reading this over and over again...